"God, I hope I get it!"

I've just about finished my three hundredth round of belting stuff from A Chorus Line and am still about to click "Play" again. It's a fabulous show and one of the most honest works in theatre history; but its Tony Award-winning goodness is not the reason I've suddenly begun this Chorus Line craze.

I have just sent my first job application. Ever.

The anxiety and the constantly drifting thoughts of "God, I hope I get it!!" robbed me of sleep (though I've composed cute little limericks at 4 am in the hopes of tiring myself) and consumed every other nook and cranny in the Brain of Margaret. In fact, that is why this entry has come to be---distraction.

The application letter was for a 1 week work experience placement at Opera Australia (in the performance area) and, boy, did I screw up big time. You will never believe what an AIRHEAD I must now seem like! I actually forgot to put my contact details in. Sure I emailed it, but I SHOULD HAVE put it on the darn letter!! So that though process went through my head this morning and I'm telling ya, my hands have never sweat so much in my life.

And it gets worse because I had no idea what to do. You know what I did? I added it in the letter and re-sent it with the "I humbly apologize for the lack of information" crap. Now they think I'm disorganized, unprofessional and well... a scatter brained teenager (not that some of these thing aren't true, but they're not supposed to find out yet!).

God, I hope I get it.
I hope I get it.
How many people does he need?

God, I really blew it!
I really blew it!
How could I do a thing like that?

Now I'll never make it!
I'll never make it!
He doesn't like the way I look.
He doesn't like the way I dance.
He doesn't like the way I...

- "God I Hope I Get It" Lyrics by Edward Kleban

Should I have left it?